:: just about me ::
:: My struggle :: (till now)
I was a struggling person from childhood. Then I had many problems as physical, mental, psychological, social & psychological etc. My parents have all the facility as money etc, but never tried to make treatment for my problems and deceases. Instead they all get involved in personal quarrel all the days. It spoiled my mental condition a lot more which resulted in mental problems like depression, anxiety & over thinking etc. By the way I got passed out of my high school boards & went to study at Allahabad City for further studies b’coz of no option of studying science stream at my high school of my home town.
The next two years I spend struggling at Allahabad for my intermediate boards in a really big and beautiful college named KP inter college which had a big play ground also. It was challenging for me specifically b’coz I had a fast memory loss problem also b’coz of which the subjects which I had well memorised in 11th (& got 99 marks out of 100 in math) got forgotten in 12th board examination. that’s the year of 2001-2003 & then I was given Rs.1500 only for pocket money, room rent including electricity bill & collage or coaching fees also.
By the way in this period I got learned to make food & tea etc by self which was then an exciting experience for me . I had to wash my clothes and other stuff also.
However I gave engineering entrance exam in 2004 & got rank near about 20,000 while In architecture I got near about 1500 rank. But I was not so satisfied with my rank so that I would take admission in college, so I take 3 more years to study in which I learned meditation first which helped me a lot for recovering from my mental, physical problems as well as to make concentration for study & studied at career point at Allahabad City and individuals at Kanpur city.
In this small period I got my first dispute with some bad guys. After that I went to BBD college of engineering situated near Delhi.
There I take external hostel room instead of college hostel. There I got my second dispute with 1st year student deepak tripathi, a bad minded political person from Allahabad.
After that I tried to study a lot at College but some of my personal problems as given above and more b’coz of incorporation of college staff I decided to leave the college specially b’coz of staff’s political agenda of ‘devide and rule’ and make money benefits also by harassing students.
By the way after leaving my college I don’t know how I get suddenly more and more deceased physically as well as mentally. My caretaker was always my mother, but in such a long time my problems never get diminished instead increased always. The medicines she gave me never worked but give side-effects instead. One time was that when I got 42 plus sized nearly & recovered by self strategy.
In this period I was made to go for an unknown journey where I had to do many such things that I never even thought to do. The all people,friends,relatives & parents I knew before had hurt me by heart. I had to fight totally unwillingly & forcefully by using bad mental medicines & sometimes by emotional blackmail. Sometimes it seems as a game, but suddenly it get converts into bloody fights. The bad comments at me & other good people,locking girls & selling them for sex, rape & murders became a common incidents. My food & water became poisonous. I had to be stay at home all the time. I never given sufficient money so that I would not go out even to work myself. The money given to me was so insufficient that it might not fulfill My daily needs. The money of my research also captured by my parents and neibours etc. The people came to give my research or money also got captured by these people. To make me live like prisoner many person around me were working like guard sometimes by greed of money & honey or sometimes by devide & rule. My all close relatives are involved in it. I also got prisoned at mental hospital for no specific reason. The doctors treating me never told me a clear illness details or duration ofter when I would be well. Each medicine had side-effects more than it’s effects. Also I had on servielance of mind reader & Heart reader To get information & to get emotionally tortured.
In all my life journey I make many innovations but never got that experience which might make me satisfied.
By the way “Be Cool & Confident “!!!
